August 7th, 2016
I was so busy with work, I couldn’t even make time to crack on the lady in the cat t-shirt, resembling a chunky Velma from Scooby-Doo, who sat across the room from me (yes, across the room) and obnoxiously told her two companions about her five cats. … That is, until she spoke the words, “I’m going to be one of those crazy cat ladies someday. That’s my little joke that I tell people.”
At that point, as she giggled and jiggled, I couldn’t help but laugh out loud and blow my cover. The sight of her companions’ faces as they gave her the, ‘you already ARE, you crazy bitch!’ face was just too much for me to handle — I couldn’t contain it. That blank stare, dripping with that judging pitiful subtext, quickly turned into a confused vulnerability, as their heads turned towards my cackling.
I struggled to play it off, but it was too late I was already busted. Embarrassed for them, I slipped my headphones back on and found some random tunes to distract me, but my chuckles ensued. The awkward trio were up and out within the next five minutes.
I admit it. I’m an ass hole. And I’m sure as soon as Velma gets home, her cats are going to hear all about this. Those poor fur balls are going to get an ear full! When she calms down and puts them in their little kitty pajamas that they undoubtedly wear every night, I’m sure they’ll all get a good laugh about my antics. And I deserve that. I mean, fair is fair, after all … right?